Ways to Speak the Five Love Languages

While the desire to love and be loved is fundamental to the human experience, sometimes our expressions of love can get lost in translation. Differing “love languages” could be one reason for this. Dr. Gary Chapman, a prominent psychologist and author, discovered that people use five main love languages to express and experience love emotionally. The five love languages apply to all relationships and can be used every day of the year. We’ve compiled a list of ideas, specific to each love language, to help you show your loved ones how much you care in a way that speaks right to their heart.
Acts of Service – For these people actions speak louder than words. “Let me do this for you” is music to their ears.

• Make their favorite meal and even clean up the kitchen afterwards.
• Surprise them with breakfast in bed and let them relax.
• Have their car detailed for them.
• Do the household task that you know they dread.

Receiving Gifts – “Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift,” says Dr. Chapman. Pay close attention to this person’s likes and dislikes and keep on the lookout for small gifts that will delight them.

• Put together a special gift basket filled with their favorite things.
• Handmake a card instead of buying one.
• Ask them for a wish list and surprise them with a couple items from the list.

Quality Time – To this person, nothing says “I love you” like your full, undivided attention. They want to feel cherished, prioritized, and spend meaningful time together.

• Take a road trip to somewhere they’ve always wanted to go.
• Try an experiential gift like a hot air balloon ride, show tickets, or whale watching.
• Have a game night.
• Take them to dinner at a quiet restaurant where you can hear each other talk.
• Take a class together such as cooking, art, dancing, or wine tasting.

Words of Affirmation – This language uses words to affirm other people. Your unsolicited compliments and encouragement mean the world to this person.

• Compliment them every day for the month.
• Write them a letter or a heartfelt message in a card.
• Write affirmations, encouragements, and love notes and post them around the house.
• Make a list of all the qualities you love about them and read it out loud to them.

Physical Touch – Nothing speaks love more deeply than appropriate physical touch to this person. You must show your love physically for them to feel loved.

• Grab some blankets and pillows and cozy up on the couch for a movie night.
• Go for a long walk and hold hands.
• Take a dance class together.
• Give them a gift certificate for a massage.
• Give them a foot rub or draw them a bath.

No matter what your love language is, you can mix and match the suggestions above to connect with those you care about and enrich your relationships. If you need help maintaining or improving your relationships, reach out to us at 909-985-0513 for an appointment. Our caring counselors have experience working with individuals, couples, and families at any stage in their relationship.
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Sources: 5lovelanguages.com, dayspring.com, verilymag.com